The other day, I wondered if the women who send me their orgasms are faking them.
The comments – always thoughtful – as well as a few back channel communications by e-mail – got me thinking further.
“Faking it” is, I suspect, unhelpful as a concept here. The question I meant to ask, and that I believe Luna implied, wasn’t whether the orgasms themselves were faked, but whether the vocalizations preceding and accompanying the orgasms were performed.
As I thought about this, it seemed to me even this isn’t quite the right way to frame the question – at least not the questions I find most interesting.
The questions I find most interesting are: first, how does the orgasm submitted to me by a woman compare to an orgasm she might have on her own, in the privacy of her bedroom? And second, how “authentic” are the recorded vocalizations?
On the first question, I assume there are differences in the sounds of orgasms in different circumstances. My orgasms sound different in different circumstances. When I’m masturbating alone it’s different than if I’m masturbating next to you while you sleep; when I’m masturbating next to you while you’re watching it’s different than when we’re each masturbating simultaneously. When you’re on video, it’s different. And so on. And so on. So I just assume that submitted orgasms differ from solo orgasms. How is an interesting question, and I wish it were possible to know, other than by report.
It’s the second question that’s more knotty: what is “authentic”? What does it mean if you moan because you think moaning will turn me on? When I paid for “massages,” there was no worse turn-off than a fake “ooh, baby” from a woman soullessly tugging on my cock. But if she seemed genuinely aroused? And gave voice to that? It might just be enough to bring me over the edge, trumping my vaunted self-control.
When a woman sends me her orgasm, is it “inauthentic” if she’s vocalizing to turn me on, in part? Because the thought that the sounds she’s making will make my cock hard(er)? I don’t know.
I will say this. It never occurred to me, with a single orgasm that’s been sent to me, that I was hearing something other than an authentic communication of a woman’s erotic experience.
To those of you who’ve sent me orgasms – what do you have to say on this subject? Were you “phony moaning”? “Faking it”? (And thank you, Lilly, for anticipating this request – and fulfilling it. You know there will always be a welcome home here for your juicy, loud orgasms.)
I really really want to know.
You once described an orgasm of mine and that is exactly what happens when I’m by myself. It’s like I’m trying to control it, yet I can’t handle it. And just like anything that’s under pressure…
When I was recording my orgasms for you, I often thought I was too quiet in the build up. I tried adding extra sighs, moans etc. but it didn’t feel right at the time and it put me off. What you got was real. But I can fully understand a woman adding that little something more if she doesn’t know what you want, if she expects you to want a certain something or if she’s slightly insecure or unsure of herself.
I occasionally record orgasms on video for a dominant friend of ours. The one time I am loud, the next I am not. It just depends on my mood and how I get to my orgasm.
Your comments about authenticity resonate with me. By that, I take you to mean: does the accommodating party *enjoy* the accommodation. Not necessarily do they enjoy the thing they are doing (in certain coercive dynamics, it may even be better if they don’t), but do they derive pleasure from this specific act of pleasing. When somebody goes through the motions, without experiencing pleasure themselves, then there is an inherent disconnect between the parties. The moment is no longer a *shared* experience.
“When a woman sends me her orgasm, is it “inauthentic” if she’s vocalizing to turn me on, in part?”
What about a woman who normally does not vocalize, doing so, so that she has something to record for you?
All good questions.