My friend

I just got an e-mail from my friend. She’s in some distress, feeling alone, abandoned, vulnerable, scared. Understandably.

Her impulse? To return to the man who delivered her the beatings that have resulted in surgeries, infections, more surgeries.

“I don’t think I can do this,” she wrote.

I called her, but she’s five time zones away, in another country. We talked, but I’m truly not the best resource, and she needs more, in any event.

Are there any survivors of domestic violence in the UK who could offer themselves up as telephonic support to her? She didn’t ask for and may well reject any offers of help. But she needs voices of sanity in her head, on her phone. Right now I fear I may be the only one, or one of a very few.

If you’re willing to be put in touch with her, reach out to me, via e-mail (nlikes at the domain of this blog) or Twitter (@nlikes).



  1. N,
    I wish still had friends living there. However, if she wants/needs some support, an ear to listen, someone to email/text back and forth I’d be more than willing. I will say this, no this hasn’t been my personal experience however I’ve many friends who have been there and one currently going thru a milder version(no surgeries) of this and because of this I’m available to her(my friend) 24/7. Am I a professional? By no means, but I studied it in university and have hands on experience. Even continued my stuidies within the last 4 years on the psychology of abuse. Mostly for my own gains to understand my childhood abuse. Talk w/her and if she’s interested feel free to pass on my information.

  2. My sentiments are the same as monkey girls. If all she needs is the voice of reason and an ear to listen, I am certainly willing to pass on my number/email as such. The only friends I have in the UK are in London and they are Ministers…not bad people at all…wonderful people actually, but I am not sure that that is what she is looking for. I leave it up to you either way. No offense taken if neither is what she needs at this time. At least you and she know there are those that care.

      1. I’m really glad she is doing well. I know the torment, the inner struggle from seeing my mother go through it…she’s a brave woman and should be proud of herself at every single turn as she decides to brave the world she is unfamiliar with instead of going back to what she knows. It’s beautiful and tragic and amazing…

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