“You really are difficult,” Sofia wrote to me. She’s right, of course. We were talking about how I respond to the sensation of being desired.
That is all.
Over the last couple of years, I’ve had two connections – with L and with V – that have been unlike anything previous in my life. (The relationship I had with the Historian was similar, structurally, though it was shorter, less intense, less comprehensive.) These were connections with women who submitted to me gleefully, who […]
Approach, avoid continues, and I’m reminded of Poison – and my reaction to her. Poison, for those who missed her, is the woman who, years ago, set off the reaction that led to my understanding that I’m an addict. When a woman shows interest in me, my body goes into overdrive. Almost inevitably – at […]
Up and down I go. I haven’t written much about it, but V and I have been “broken up” for a while. A couple of weeks ago, for a moment, it seemed like we might be back together. But the problems that drove us apart (about which I’ll write more in a post to come […]
Does anyone want? I’m so meta in everything, I never do something so straightforward as want-ing. When I want, there are multiple components to what I’m doing. I’m anticipating, I’m “self-ing,” defining myself with respect to what it is I want, and I’m aching for the meaning around the object, person, activity I desire, for […]
When I see a hot woman with a great ass in tight black leggings, what I think is not explicitly sexual. I don’t imagine bending her over and fucking her (although, for sure, I would enjoy doing so). I don’t imagine her sucking my cock, or even revealing herself to me, performing for me, submitting […]
Actually, I don’t. I thought I did. But I was wrong. What I want, it turns out, is different: I want you to want me to get what I want. A subtle distinction, but an important one.
She’s hot. Long, brunette hair. And a long, black-and-white-horizontally-striped maxi-dress. It’s tight, cotton, clingy, form-fitting. Her curves are almost violent. Underneath, I can see, she’s wearing a bikini. She’s with several hot friends, the others just in bikinis. Why is it that what’s hidden is so much more… hot… than what’s revealed? I can see her […]
Who needs a car? I love that travel here necessarily involves intimate contact with hundreds, thousands. For many, this overwhelms, For me, it enraptures. This morning, a woman – taller than I’m usually drawn to – walked before me. Her long legs were muscular, toned, and a short red cotton dress hung on her. She […]