I’m not tall

My wife likes tall guys. I’m on the short end of average – 5’8″.

It wasn’t until the last couple of years of sexual activity that I understood that it’s height, not penis size, that is the single largest determinant of what women in whom I’m interested sexually seem to find attractive.

This sucks for me.

I suppose there are women who crave shorter, or average-height guys. But my sexual persona – confident, commanding dominant – just seems to go better with height.

I’m working this through, trying to understand how it works, what it means, but in the mean time, I’m still not tall.


  1. I am 5’2, and I like guys taller than me, but what I actually am into is feeling smaller than they are. I want to believe they could pin me down and restrain me. I find perceived strength, physically and mentally, far more important than the genetics. I want to feel/believe that I wont break or smoosh them if I’m on top :). Generally I go for 4 or more inches taller than me. Someone rail thin and tall would be less attractive that some one shorter with more body mass.

  2. I think there’s a certain amount of conditioning for women, a social expectation, that a man will be taller. Just think of the comments about “poor Tom Cruise” and his various amazonian wives who weren’t able to wear heels when they were with him!
    I’m 5’6, with a bit of a thing for wearing skyscraper heels, so I often feel as tall as, if not taller than, my husband (5’10), and it can on occasion feel a little odd, even after all these years. I agree with Elle Marie though that often it’s about FEELING smaller. One of the sexiest guys I’ve been with was “only” 5’8, but he definitely more than made up for it by his general confidence.

  3. I learned to appreciate being told what to do… and frankly, for me, I’d say it’s taut muscles and tone of voice that seem to be far more important than height. I’ve had quite nice experiences with guys shorter than me… luckily, since I’m quite tall!! As you say, height doesn’t matter much if I’m kneeling before you, or bent over 😉

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