Chatting you up

A while ago, I mentioned that Woopra, a nifty little tool that lets me stalk you, readers, also lets me (gasp) pop up on your screen and chat with you. My fellow blogger Ferns, the author of Domme Chronicles (a fine blog that I notice hasn’t been in my blogroll, but really should be, and so now, is), recently conducted a little poll of her readers, asking them how they would feel if she popped up on their screens in a little chat box while they were surfing. Eighty percent of those answering the poll (132, to date, constitute that 80%) said, “Thrilled… yay, a chat!!”

In the comments on that post, there was considerably less enthusiasm. I’ve used it, I believe, twice. Once, with L, and once, with Liza. I tried a third time with a woman who briefly was a distant buddy, or so I thought, but she didn’t answer when I chatted her (and she’s since ceased being a distant buddy, for reasons having to do with her primary relationship).

But I confess: there’s a part of me that would get off (sexually or otherwise) in connecting with regular readers of this blog. As I’ve written, the blog consistently gets 200-250 visitors a day. But there are a few of you – you know who you are – who come back day after day. I know because Woopra keeps track of visitors in some way I don’t entirely understand. It seems to be mostly IP address, but there’s more to it, because clearly some people visit from multiple IP addresses, and Woopra sometimes figures that out. And sometimes, it doesn’t.

So anyway… maybe you come directly here; maybe, you subscribe to my RSS feed; maybe you’re triggered by the automatic tweets about my posts, maybe you subscribe to e-mail alerts. But there are a few of you who come often. You guys, I want to know. I want to know what you like about the blog, what keeps pulling you back. I want to know for two reasons: first, narcissistic curiosity. You know, the Sally Field thing: If you like me, you really like me, I want to know just what it is that you like. And second, to at least a small extent, I want to be responsive. Not that I want the blog to be other than what it is, or that I want to write about things other than the things about which I want to write. But I do like, you know, to give the people what they want.

So here’s a warning: if you’ve been here more than, say, fifty times, then I’m warning you that I may, at some point, pop up on your screen with a little chat box. You may ignore me, or decline my request. Or you may accept it, and see where it goes.

And feel free to pillory me, or call me creepy, or whatever, in the comments. Obviously.


  1. This happened to me once in a work context. Being the technical Luddite that i am it completely freaked me out mainly because I thought I’d done something in my settings to cause it. But then not everyone is as stupid as me. (And so long as there are no camera’s involved I think it’s a great idea… well, at least not without prior consent!)

    1. Ooh – CAMERAS! Yes! A webcam chat agent!

      No, there are no cameras involved, and the way it works, I think, is that a box pops up and asks if you want to accept my request….

      1. HAHA! Don’t tell me you hadn’t already checked if there was a webcam version. I won’t believe you! 🙂
        So, does it specify what your request might be or is it more of an ‘answer if you dare’?

          1. HAHA. OK. In the more serious and thoughtful vein of other responses… I like reading because you are such a pedant. But then my flippancy seems to piss you off so I take a break sometimes 🙂

  2. There are several reasons why I enjoy reading your blog:

    – You’re an excellent writer, one of three bloggers whom I’ve read who address and explore complex issues in a serious voice without being, or sounding, pedantic. Additionally, you – like the other two – avoid being strident, which many bloggers fail to do when they discuss issues which are important to them (note: there are several equally good writers of blogs, but their voices are stylistically very different).

    – You don’t take it as a personal affront when a commenter disagrees with you, and seem genuinely interested in engaging in thoughtful discussion and appreciating the perspective from which the other person is arguing, even if you ultimately don’t agree with him/her. When you do disagree, you are polite.

    – You aren’t afraid to apologize when you have erred, miscommunicated or mishandled something.

    – It’s intriguing to me to watch you reveal in your posts in which areas you take yourself seriously and in which you don’t. Everyone’s sensitivities are different in this respect, and I find this aspect of people’s characters very interesting.

    With respect to what you write, all the posts which are discussions of sex and sexuality as opposed to sexy stories are interesting, including the ones in which you talk about your backstory. Of the posts that are sexy stories, I prefer the ones that are more general to the ones that involve specific (i.e., named) people.

    It’s not the same as the first one, unfortunately, but…good enough?

  3. The poll was fun, and frankly, I was surprised such a high percentage of readers would want to talk to me (as a reader that sort of thing would freak me out).

    I’ve initiated a chat a few times now when I was in the mood for talking with a stranger (rare!), and the folks I spoke to were really interesting, engaging, and very forthcoming. Fun!

    Plus, being a control freak, I do like that I get to initiate a chat when and if I feel like it (which is very different from giving someone my IM details).

    Thanks for the blog add.


    1. My readers hate polls. Or I’ve only asked questions they have no interest in answering. Or I really have no readers.

      In any event, I love your blog.

  4. Maybe it is the content of my page or maybe it is because I have a vagina. Any road I find that if people want to chat with me they will find me somehow. That is the joy of using social media to promote myself I guess. The problem I have is that the majority of messages I get from said people go something like, “Hi there, Love your work, wanna see my cock?” Now I do love cock, I married Jake because his cock was so pretty (true story!) but I don’t want my first image of a person to be his penis thanks.

    So as long as you don’t message me asking for a picture swap or virtual sex that would be fine.

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