Writing about sex

I don’t really like writing about sex.

This may be an odd confession, for a writer of a self-styled “sex blog,” but it’s true: I don’t like writing about sex.

Honestly, what is there to say? There are so many words one can use as stand-ins for “penis.” And honestly, once we’ve dispensed with “cock” and “dick,” we’re in the land of the comic. Ditto vaginas (after “pussy” and “cunt”), and breasts (after “breasts” and “tits”). Similarly, there’s a limited (though less so) universe of adverbs and adjectives suitable to descriptions of sex. And there are only so many ways that most people, that I, actually go about having sex. Ninety percent of the sex I have is on or near beds. Ninety percent involves one or the other using the bed for support in some form or fashion. And ninety percent of it involves two or more of the following: fingers, mouths, breasts, pussies, cocks, assholes.

Sure, there are exceptions: there’s the standing fuck, there’s the desk fuck, the wall fuck, the chair fuck. There’s the chair blowjob, the standing/kneeling blowjob. Etc.

But honestly.

This just isn’t what’s interesting to me about the sex I have, and it shows in my writing.

I just finished writing about part 1 of my most recent date with Véronique. I’ll post it shortly. But I’m struck: part 1 is the part that ends right before the sex begins, and there’s a big part of me that just wants to stop there, to say, “You know, then we had sex. She sucked my cock, I licked her pussy, we fucked a bit, and then we did it all again. And again. There was some laughing, some awkwardness, more than a little just raw hotness, and through it all, we both had a really fucking good time.”

I’m not sure what this is about, whether it’s interesting, or not. (It is to me, but I don’t know that that interest extends beyond me.)

You’ll get both part 1 and part 2 shortly. I’m just pausing here, as I write the two parts, to notice that it’s part 1 where all my energy goes. (V, you’re doing your Rashomon thing here, too; do you have thoughts? Is this the same for you? Different? Do you enjoy writing about the sex more than? the same as? less than? the lead-up?)


  1. I totally understand that. The whole “word choice” thing is a real road block for me when I write about sex. In an effort to sound natural and not ridiculous, I try to avoid…member, shaft, nether lips, and quivering hole. Good lord. But, people keep buying it, no matter how “not new” it is. Sex is sex…and it sells. It’s just hard to make it new when we write. I’m with you about telling the story and then stopping before you get to the gritty details. It’s that lead-up that turns me on, anyway. Looking forward to it.

  2. I’m struck by how much this post resonates with me. I loved writing Part 1. I labored over it. I read it aloud. I masturbated to it God knows how many times before I sent it on to you.

    Now here I am almost a week later and I still haven’t finished Part 2. I’ve opened it and tweaked it, but am not really compelled to put in a lot of time.

    The moments I’m enjoying most have little do with the sex for exactly for the reason you described. I can’t adequately express how fucking amazing it feels when your mouth is on me, or how much I love dropping to my knees for you… I just want to experience it. (Right about now, please… 😉

    Instead, I find myself laboring over elements of my anticipation, my nervousness, my excitement to please you in every way possible.

    Perhaps I’ll keep the sex brief in writing, if not in person?


Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.