Sleepless Sundays
Sometimes I struggle to sleep….
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Privilege, shame, and brutality
I can breathe.
Read moreStrength and safety, dominance and terror
The addictive elixir of submission.
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Edges: where the action happens
Why clothing is sexier than nudity; why lace is hotter than cotton; why fishnets appeal….
Read moreI’m sensitive
I torture myself.
Read moreObject permanence and fear of annihilation
Infantile wounds leave me vulnerable to the annihilating terror of ceasing to exist.
Read moreSeparation
My mother abandoned me….
Read morePondering punishment
When Marina behaves badly, I want to hurt her. Well, not hurt her. But I want her to suffer. And I don’t want to suffer. And, I want her to stop behaving badly. Marina – for all her virtues – consistently behaves badly, in one particular way.
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I owned Marina’s cunt for 48 hours (part 1)
An inauspicious start to my owning Marina’s cunt for 48 hours.
Read moreSex and sadness and happiness
For me, sex is best tinged with a bit of sadness. Sadness provides an edge.
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