Territory
The Interior
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Reminiscing, or, narcissism
Read moreI re-read my own blog, and I liked it. But narcissism is more complicated than vanity — especially when your self-esteem hinges on whether you’re wanted, and how much, and by how many.
Finishing "shame"
Read moreI got a detail wrong about *Shame*, and in correcting it, I found a whole other movie hiding inside two minutes of Lucy Walters’s face.
Watching “shame” again – pleasure and joy
Read moreMichael Fassbender’s soulless, brilliant performance yanks my heart out — it captures so much of what I remember from that time in my life.
A great ass in leggings
Read moreWhat I think when I see a great ass in leggings is not what you might expect. It’s conceptual, not explicit — and that distinction may explain more about me than I’d like.
Sex scarcity
Read moreA man’s inarticulate defense of rape led me to a more honest reckoning with the frustration of sex scarcity — one that justifies nothing, but that nearly every straight man has felt.
The etiology of shame
Read moreWhere shame comes from, and why I need it.
Loneliness and rejection
Read moreI tossed off a quick answer about loneliness, then spent the next few hours realizing I was wrong about myself — and tracing the line from rejection to shame to paying for the very rejection I was trying to escape.
I’m an expert at time management
Read moreNeed help with time management? Hire an addict. We juggle more logistics before breakfast than most people do all week.
Secrets and lies
Read moreOn secrecy, privacy, parental spying, and Edward Snowden.
Creep shots revisited (again)
Read moreI struggle with whether creep shots are violating of women’s privacy. I decide to behave as if they are, but I remain unconvinced….
I want you to want me
Read moreA subtle but important distinction about the nature of my desire.
On narcissism
Read moreA loyal reader’s compliment sends me down a predictable rabbit hole: am I endlessly self-reflective, or just endlessly self-absorbed?
On men
Read moreMy cock’s in Mary-Anne’s mouth, but my mind’s on Jeff. What’s that about?
Elegy for p (first in a series)
Read moreShe disappeared slowly, then all at once. I miss her.
Obscure
Read moreWhat’s hidden is so much hotter than what’s revealed.
Meditation
Read moreI came to meditation through Elizabeth Gilbert and the Hare Krishnas, which should tell you something about me.
Procrasturbation
Read moreA dreaded task, a hard cock, and the rabbit hole between them.
Gossip
Read moreGossip made me feel icky. I wish I could say that’s because I’m above it.
Self-destruction
Read moreShe stood me up two nights in a row, and two nights in a row, I let her. This isn’t a complaint about her — it’s an observation about me.
Rethinking addiction
Read moreMy thinking about sex addiction is evolving — the neuroscience is more interesting, and the sex addiction industrial complex more bankrupt, than I previously understood.
