Musing

I contrast my past destructive obsession with commercial sex against my current generative, productive compulsion with AI tools.

I’m trying to give myself permission to fantasize about off-limits women. It’s HARD!

I struggle to accept the loss of women in my life, a pattern rooted in losing my mother repeatedly.

There’s just so much content here; you should be able to find stuff! This is one such (really fun) way.

I reflect on my lack of passionate, spontaneous sex and the losses inherent in any particular sexual configuration.

I keep telling myself a story, using various women, in which I do everything right but am still left, feeling somehow at fault and unable to prevent or repair the loss.

I fucking love what AI has made possible. Check this out! You can see all the pictures associated with all the posts associated with any individual tag, all at once. You can even make a little slideshow!

I want to consciously allow myself to fantasize about sex, scenarios, and people—regardless of possibility or appropriateness—while reminding myself that imagination does not require action.

I’m producing more work than ever thanks to AI, but I’m overwhelmed by unfinished drafts, a sense of online obsolescence, and my own mortality.

I geneuinely believe I’m the best ever.