Musing

There’s a little “open relationship mini-quiz” that’s been making the internet rounds lately. It showed up here, and here. I thought I’d tackle it as well for your reading pleasure. 1. What insight about open relationships do you wish you…

I overheard a coworker the other day lamenting us men. “Egos!” she exclaimed. “You all have such fragile egos.” We do, you know. I’m so often struck by this. For years, I worked in a high-powered, hard-charging field, populated not…

There’s something about the image of a woman spreading her legs – clothed – for me that is about the most arousing thing I can imagine. This afternoon, I had some writing (not blog-related) to do. I got a fair…

The hottest girl in the world (THGITW), other than my wife, had her own reply to my post the other day, about cheating and judgment, and to the responses in the comments, but since she is the hottest girl in…

Lately, I’ve been observing – and feeling – all sorts of judgment. Now, when I’m at my best, I’m almost entirely non-judgmental. I don’t like judgment, don’t like judging people, don’t like feeling judged. The truth is, I think it’s…

I have a friend. Like many women – like most women I know, horrifyingly – she’s been raped. Like even more (I can’t substantiate that with a citation, but I believe it to be true), she has the occasional rape…

Dan Savage wrote a column last week arguing, forcefully, that polyamory isn’t a sexual orientation. This seems to me akin to “presenting both sides of the evolution debate,” granting some basic structural plausibility to a ridiculous assertion, the mere speaking aloud…

I wrote the other day about how I sometimes use porn (and, incidentally, used commercial sex) not when I’m feeling intense sexual desire, but when I’m deep on the opposite side of the desire spectrum, when I’m feeling pain, numb,…

I love ’em tiny. Some while back, I wrote about my insane, unquenchable, out-of-the-blue hunger for a redhead. Any redhead. I wrote that I don’t usually crave a type – sometimes I crave sex, and sometimes I crave sex with…

Porn’s funny. Conventional wisdom holds that we use porn when we’re horny. But this isn’t quite right, I think. I mean, I know it’s not quite right for me, and I suspect it’s not right for many. I use porn in…