Musing

If you’ve been following this blog, you know that a key concern of mine is my likability. I want you to like me, not just to come here for the prurient bits (which I do hope you like as much…

Another thought about what sometimes puts people off about me, about this blog:  my experience is a bit scary.  Some people radiate joy and decadence and hedonism – like Violet & Rye, and Liza, and L. Me, I have lots…

Thanks, Dan Savage, for contributing this word (and not just Santorum) to our language. L is working through her shit.  She and her husband are on a road that’s not the same one T and I are on, that doesn’t…

What makes us jealous? For me, it’s invariably the fear that I’ll be jettisoned, whether because of some genuine shortcoming of mine or, more likely, simply because someone else has more, better than I do. But it boils down not…

Lately, I’ve been thinking a bit about how money works, about how it can simultaneously deliver and undermine fantasies. As I’ve written about before, my ultimate fantasy is endless oral sex with endless women.  And I’m a lucky guy –…

I just want you to like me. I’ve written before about the relationship between my desire to be seen, not to be judged, and to be desired and approved affirmatively. I was talking with L about this blog, about my hunger…

To date, my sex life has consisted almost entirely of assertions of my power and control. I’ve done this with money, paying women to give me massages or provide lap dances or companionship; I’ve done it with dominance, providing direction…

Well, who knows about endings? Last night, L and I had a date scheduled – our first date since our resumption of regularly scheduled programming.  It’s funny how these things work:  that was three weeks ago, and since then, our…

There’s generous, open, compliant submission. There’s freely given, but somewhat reluctant, submission. And then there are bratty subs.

Google’s interesting, and I don’t understand how it works (as I’ve written before).  It baffles me that people have arrived at this blog after Googling things as obscure as “fucking star,” or as improbable as “gay porno.” It got me…