SeekingArrangement

I’m updating my Seeking profile. It’s been good – I’ve met a number of lovely women, both those with whom I’ve stretched and those whom I’ve dated. But it’s a bit of a wall of text, and I think it’s due for an update. Before I do that, though, I thought I’d archive the current version here:

About Me

I know what this site is about. I know that what I have to offer isn’t what most women on this site seek. So please – read what I have to say before you waste your time on me. And if you reach the end and are more, rather than less, interested than you were at the start? Well then, you and I are likely to get on like a house on fire.

I know that the vast majority of women here join hoping their needs will be met by a generous, wealthy, and maybe hot and fun man. And some imagine they might also fall in love. While others join with a more… transactional… mindset.

I know, also, that men here join with sometimes similar, and sometimes different hopes.

I have no judgment. For years I was a very conventional man here, in terms of what I offered, what I sought. And then, over a decade ago, I walked away from the site altogether. I was out of control and driven, compulsive,  addicted (if you think sex addiction is a thing).

For years after that, then, my profile languished. My life changed a LOT. My wife and I opened up our marriage, became “monogamish.” I started writing a sex blog – one of the only ones written by a man.

And.

I discovered that everything I was doing here was toxic for me.

Somewhere along the line, on a lark, I briefly reactivated my profile. I did this every year for a few years – briefly reactivated, and the rest of the year dark. The first time, I did it to promote my blog. The second time? To try to meet a few women who wouldn’t be seeking an arrangement, but WOULD be happy to find ME. Amazingly? I met a few. Not a lot. But a few.

So I did that again a few times over a few years – I’d turn the profile on just long enough to collect a sexy playmate or two. And then, busy, I’d turn it off and forget about it. And then remember again and turn it on. (Rinse and repeat.)

In my 40s I had lost a lot of weight in part by hiring two hot trainers who would dress as I asked and motivate me to get to the gym by stimulating my libido. (My brilliant wife’s idea.) Fast forward to 2020. Pandemic. I was fat again. I was inflexible. I felt terrible. I dialed up one of my old trainers (well, both, actually, but one had moved away and no longer worked as a trainer). I hired my trainer back. Now married, with a toddler, she (and her son) helped me lose 50 pounds over Zoom. They helped me reach a weight I hadn’t seen since adolescence. Literally.

But I knew there was another piece to my self-directed physical therapy: I needed to start stretching. A lot. Like an hour or more a day. My body starts off inflexible, but years of injury and neglect left me in a state where pretty much any physical activity simply felt bad. And here, my wife’s idea of a decade ago resurfaced: what if I stretched with a hot woman or two (or seven)? If they dressed as I reasonably, respectfully, might ask, and/but motivated me to do something I really really hate doing by, once again, appealing to my libido?

Interesting idea, right?

I turned once again to Seeking (no longer the “SeekingArrangement” of old), paid for a 3-month membership, and changed my profile. That was in January of 2021, I think. In the time since then, I’ve stretched with a dozen or two really sexy women on Zoom – some for over a year. I’ve done Pilates with two or three. And hooked up with/dated (with no “arrangement”…) two – one for over a year.

A rousing success!

So….

Seeking

Attentive, Flexible schedule, Long-term, Mentorship, Non-monogamous, Open relationship, All ethnicities

What I offer/seek:

1. Be my stretching or Pilates partner. Dress hot. Give me good angles. Have a good camera on your laptop and decent Wi-Fi. And I’ll express appreciation for your time.

2. Or …. If you’ve read all this, and are still reading. If you nipped over to my blog and my particular brand of thoughtful, somewhat intellectual, dominance, turned you on…. Maybe the fact that I’m not so interested in an “arrangement” doesn’t matter so much to you. Maybe what I have to offer actually lines up pretty well with what it is you seek. If this is you, I know you don’t occupy the most populous neighborhood in the chart I described above. But I also know you wouldn’t be the first, that there ARE some women here for whom fun was what motivated them to join, more than something else.

In that case, I want you to be my muse. To inspire me to write. To make me need to write about you, about what you do to me, about how you affect me. About the hunger you produce in me, about the ways you feed that hunger.

Words are my currency. I want to share with the world the ardor you inspire in me. I want you to make me ache, to make me need. And I want to show others how you do it, how you feed my dominance with your submission in ways that leave us both hungry. If all goes well, my words will feed something deep in you, something that, perhaps, you didn’t even know could be fed. I will show you parts of yourself you didn’t know existed, both in our time together, and in the words I write.

I know this all is unusual for this site – and maybe I’m not what you’re looking for – but I assure you, while I may not be what you’re looking for, I’m great to find.

P.S. If your message to me doesn’t indicate that you’ve read this entire profile, that you actually understand what I’m saying, then I’m unlikely to respond. You can indicate you understand what I’m saying by leading off your message to me with “I get it.”

Thanks! I look forward to meeting you.

And finally, just a note about you, about how you might respond to me, about what YOU might be looking for:

Maybe you like the idea of being objectified. Respectfully. By someone who appreciates you, and who wants to take the burden of decision-making off your shoulders, who wants to deliver to you – and take from you – without your having even to think. Perhaps you like the idea of turning your brain off for a few hours. If thinking about this – about someone choosing what you wear, where you go, what you drink, what you eat, what you do – appeals, well, then, we have a lot to talk about.

N.