Ashley Madison

Amid all the press that Ashley Madison got a few years ago (back when I was a CPOS), I added it to my arsenal of ways of meeting potential partners. I bought a membership, wrote a detailed, thoughtful profile, checked all the applicable boxes, and went cruising. I read Ashley and Me – a blog ostensibly by a guy (who calls himself “Riff Dog” – and now, seemingly, no longer publishing) who likes to cheat on his wife, and reports on his remarkable luck with Ashley Madison. I was looking for tips from a pro. I followed all his recommendations, learned all his lessons. I must have sent 200 messages to women. In all that time, I got exactly one response. And though she lived all of three miles from me, try though I might to meet her, she simply never could make it work. And I never was convinced that she was really a “she” at all, if you know what I mean.

Now I’ve been around the block. I’ve used pretty much every web site there is. (More on this later, but now that I’m not a CPOS, I actually have far less interest, far less compulsivity, around finding new playmates. I have a couple, and that’s great. I don’t know that I have the time or the inclination for much more – though, of course, just ’cause I’m not looking doesn’t mean that if something came up and bit me I wouldn’t bite back.) But on no website have I had such an abysmal result. I went back and looked at the messages I sent, at the profiles to which I responded, and here’s what I’ve concluded: the vast majority of women’s profiles on that site simply must be fraudulent, created by the operators of the website to keep the men paying. And maybe the same is true of Ashley and Me.

Or, maybe I just wasn’t what those particular ladies were seeking. Anyone have any other experience to report here?


  1. I've read Ashley and Me on and off, more out of morbid fascination than anything, and I was disappointed when the blog was taken offline recently.  I've never used Ashley Madison – to tell the truth I don't think I've ever visited the site – but I'm not the sort to judge someone who cheats, provided it's not my wife.  I'm curious to see what others have to say, as your experiences with the site are 100% at odds with Ashley and Me, making me wonder if this blog was, perhaps, sponsored by Ashley Madison to raise expectations.-Jack

  2. I had sex with 15 AM women from 2009 – 2015. I had a system. It took time and patience but it was very worth it. Yes, many profiles are fake or fraudulent but there are real ones. About half of the women I continued to have sex with. Some of them I still have sex with today

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