I just want to remind myself to give myself permission to fantasize.
To fantasize about sex with people with whom I shouldn’t have sex.
To fantasize about sex I did have, to remember sex I did have.
To imagine sex I might have.
To fantasize about procurement and provision and submission.
To fantasize about people and scenarios, things that are possible and things that are not.
Things that are likely, and things that are not.
I just want to give myself a lot of permission.
Not to act, but to imagine.