Aug 242015

As I walked toward a coffee shop, I noticed a beautiful young woman – in her early 30s, I’d guess – in black spandex leggings and a black tank top. She was walking a little quicker than I, but toward the same destination. I admired her ass – full, round, not small at all. Her […]

Aug 222015
A craving

I used to pay for a lot of handjobs – massages with “happy endings.” The truth is, though, that I often didn’t want a massage with a happy ending. The “happy ending” wasn’t even central to my aim. No, what I really wanted was for a beautiful woman to (want to) attend to my cock […]

Oct 082014

I’ve had more massages than most humans. This is probably true both of “massages” and of massages. The other day, while I was having a massage (as opposed to a “massage”), I found myself thinking – as I have on occasion – about the odd way we relate to sex and sexuality, and to genitalia, […]

Jan 112014
On the sensuality of head

You thought I was talking about oral sex? You have a dirty mind. No, I’m talking about my head. About how it feels to have it touched, rubbed, massaged. In my early 20s, when I still had hair (or when I hadn’t yet admitted that I no longer did – baldness came early for me), […]

Dec 122013

Lately, I’ve been sitting myself in bars, as I’ve written, and seeing what happens. Usually (I’ve probably done it five or six times in recent weeks), nothing happens. I have a drink or two, and leave. But occasionally, something happens. A conversation gets struck up. A connection gets made. It hasn’t (yet) led to a […]

May 232013
Paying for it, revisited

If I’m honest, in my moments of greatest pain, loneliness, rejection, perceived abandonment, what I want more than anything isn’t sex. No, it’s sex with someone I’m paying. This was true before I reined in my out-of-control behavior, and it’s true since. I’d rather dial a familiar number and see a woman I’m paying to […]

Sep 072012

[With apologies in advance for the slightly advertising-y nature of this post….] Georgia is a friend of mine and a “consciousness coach and relaxation specialist.” She practices something called “Access Consciousness,” a form of bodywork with which I wasn’t previously familiar. This is from the Access Consciousness web site: … there are 32 points on your […]