Mar 292014

As I’ve written previously, one way of understanding narcissism isn’t as “incessant, adoring self-regard,” but instead, as “the centrality of the regulation of self-esteem in the conduct of one’s life.” This is me. I emerged into adulthood with the twin convictions that I’m worthless/undesirable, and that the only way that could be disproved would be […]

Mar 282014

Arrogance is in the eye of the beholder. Regardless of what the dictionary says, if you think me arrogant, there’s no meaningful objection I can, or should, offer. Someone who knows me well said, basically, “maybe your acute intelligence and impatience for fools and assholes were mistaken for arrogance.”

Mar 262014
Arrogance and confidence

I was recently told that I’m arrogant. Never mind the circumstances, except to say that, for a variety of reasons, regardless of what I actually think, circumstances demanded that I accept the premise, and apologize for my arrogance. My gut response, though, was, “I’m not arrogant. I’m confident. And sometimes, confidence is misread, particularly by […]

Dec 312012

A funny note about myself. For the vast majority of my life, rightly or wrongly, I believed that – I created the reality that – the only way a woman would find me attractive was if I paid her. In the last couple of years, I’ve traveled in the opposite direction, becoming convinced, for the […]

Dec 122012

When I was nineteen, I studied at a university in the UK. I was oversexed, and my mind was blown by the phenomenon of “Page 3 girls.” For those readers not familiar with the phenomenon certain British tabloids reserve their third page, each and every day, for a nearly full-page photo of a topless lass, […]