Apr 132015

My questions mostly regard what appears to be your very successful pastime as a serial lover of many other hot, sexual women. I haven’t read all of your essays yet, but I’m struck by how smart and emotionally/intellectually sophisticated so many of your lovers seem to be. The way you describe your real life is […]

Feb 022015

“I ran across your blog and was compelled to write you. I was taken back by your confidence and the ability you have to entertain many relationships. it opened my eyes. I am a normal guy struggling with a submissive side. I am not sure where I go from here. I just wanted to say […]

Dec 142014

I was in a sexless relationship for too long and was beginning to believe I wasn’t interested in sex and became insecure about my sexuality and seductive abilities. I have since been reawakened and am discovering more of what I like and want….but am still a bit intimidated. How would you guide me and teach […]

Dec 022014

I’ve entered into a relationship. It’s great. It hits every level of satisfaction except sexually. I’m frustrated and unsure of where to go from here…. It’s unsatisfying for both of us. To me, it feels forced. He is extremely attractive..a catch, smart, business owner-blah blah blah but down to earth and relatable.  He would get […]

Jun 302014

On three recent occasions, people have described me as “an admitted sex addict,” or some variant of that. Close readers of this blog know that my thinking on sex addiction, and on my relationship to it, is more nuanced (or muddied, or, muddled, or self-deceived) than that. I recently had an exchange with another blogger […]

Jun 192014

I’m a guy with an unusual, rule-violating Tinder profile. My profile picture is my husky, the wolfish creature at the top of this page (if you’re not on a phone). My other pics? Hotness culled from my Tumblr (stolen from people who have stolen them, for the most part). A significant portion of women with […]

May 182014

“We’re getting married. We haven’t set a date yet, but it’s more than a year off. Do you have any advice?” I have lots of advice. For this sexy young bartender, in particular, I’d say: 1) You really really should suck my cock before you stop sucking other guys’ cocks, if you haven’t already. If […]

Dec 112013

There are two basic principles I find it helpful to bear in mind in relationships: first, relationships are co-constructions of two people. If there are aspects of a relationship that make me unhappy, it’s almost always more productive for me to wonder what WE did to make it so than to blame you for its […]

Dec 082013

I recently read a number of lists targeted at general audiences about “how to know your relationship is in trouble.” These lists are almost always misleading and unhelpful, to my mind: there’s an easy way to know your relationship is in trouble, and that’s if, in your heart of hearts, you know it’s in trouble. […]