Do I follow your instructions too much? Am I too submissive? Do you wish I was brattier? I didn’t think you liked that but you like women are who are more mysterious, and I’m not that, I’m really open with you…. Do you have any other distant buddies?
Circumstances prevented me from giving Charlotte a comprehensive answer in the moment, but here’s a more better one than what I said at the time:
Do I follow your instructions too much?
Um. No. No, there is no such thing.
Am I too submissive?
I’m not sure if there’s such a thing. I’ve written a fair amount about submission here, about the submission I seek, about that offered by others. Charlotte’s worry (as you’ll see as this post continues) is that she somehow doesn’t create the obstacles that so often frustrate, torture, and attract me, like a moth to a flame. But Charlotte’s not too submissive for me; quite the contrary. Charlotte gives me precisely what I ask for when it suits her. But if her mood is off, if she’s not feeling it, if I ask for something other than what she wants to give? Often, Charlotte will push back. And often, not in a particularly submissive way. (I asked for a photo of her outside the other day. “Not gonna happen today,” was her response.) She’s worried about being too submissive, and this is her response?!? Um, no, Charlotte, you’re not too submissive to me.
Do you wish I was brattier?
That is not something I ever have wished about anyone. Seriously.
Charlotte is saying, “Would you be less likely to lose interest in me if I were less submissive, if I followed your directions less, if I were brattier?” She discerns in my writing about Anal Ava a certain intensity of ardor that has eluded her and me for a few weeks now. She imagines somehow that Anal Ava offers something I want, and that what Charlotte has to offer is something I want less.
This couldn’t be more wrong.
First off, let’s just note: Anal Ava and I have said good-bye. Mutually. It didn’t work well for either of us. While she did activate a certain manic, frenzied pursuit in me, it’s not a sustainable thing, and my patience for the unpleasant aspects of it just ain’t what it used to be.
And let’s add: I’m interacting with Charlotte every day. Still. Months after we met. We’ve only had two dates, but our next date is approaching very fast. And I. Can’t. Wait.
Finally, the last question:
Do you have any [other] distant buddies?
I don’t think of Charlotte as a distant buddy – even though she has been one for a month or so, and for the month or so between our first and second dates. But our in-person relationship – notwithstanding its intermittency – is the relationship. The distant buddy aspect is a sort of stand-in, a substitute, during this interregnum, when I can’t remind myself what her lips feel like wrapped around my cock by causing her lips to be wrapped around my cock.
So I reject the word “other” in the question.
But as for distant buddies: at the moment, no, I don’t really have any others. I have a long-standing, non-sexual, friendship with Hyacinth, over at A Dissolute Life Means. We send one another long audio recordings about our lives. I owe her one, now, for well over a month. Maybe two. She’s a buddy. She’s distant. But she’s not a distant buddy. She doesn’t want my cock (it’s too small for her), and I don’t want her (she’s not particularly submissive, and certainly not in the ways I crave).
There’s another L (about whom more shortly). She might well resume being a distant buddy. I hope so. But at the moment, I think it would be exaggerating mightily to call her that. But my fingers are crossed.
Other than that? Nope. Not a soul.
Charlotte’s concerned I’ll lose interest, that I’ll replace her. There’s at least one woman out there who feels I did this with her. But there’s not a lot of such women. And, honestly, I don’t see it happening with Charlotte. Charlotte’s gonna land herself a guy. That’s how we’re gonna come to a close. Not soon. But it will happen. And in the meantime? I’m gonna continue to put her to very. good. use.