I sit, waiting. I need to pee. I waited too long. She’s too close for me to abandon my post. Which means I’ll need to leave her alone sooner than I might like.
Here are questions whose answers, I hope, I soon will know:
- How does she kiss?
- How does her body respond to touch? To pressure?
- What does she smell like?
- What does she taste like?
- What does she feel like?
There are a thousand other questions, less explicitly sexual, more about our chemistry:
- Will she make me laugh?Will I make her laugh?Will conversation be easy?Will it shy away from, or hew toward, the sexual?What will she teach me?
- Will we have one drink together? Two? Three? (I kinda hope it’s one or two as, because reasons, I’m two in before she arrives.)
- Is she wearing underwear? (She usually doesn’t. Uncharacteristically, I gave her no instruction.)
- How will she surprise me?
I know how I will surprise her. I surprise all women I meet in ways similar to this similarly: I’m really nice. I feel really safe. Really non-threatening. She’s had a taste of this, but invariably, women who’ve read much of my blog somehow expect someone much…. More serious? More stern? than I am.
I wish I could convey this in words. I can’t. But here’s an attempt: I’m just … Nice. I intuitively make people feel comfortable. Except when I’m trying to make them uncomfortable. Which I don’t do until I’ve made them very, very comfortable. I listen well. I am interested. I am interesting. I’m relatable. Not at all overly serious. A little funny. Not anxious. I’m comfortable with silence, and speak slowly, deliberately. My voice is deep, resonant, and soft. My eyes are piercing. Capable of being off-putting, intrusive. Capable of being penetrating in the best way.
And what about Charlotte? I know her in two dimensions. But what’s her voice like in person? How does it pair with her face, her body?
Is she anxious? What’s her anxiety look like? Earlier she said she was nervous. Nervous can be hot. Hers certainly was, by text. Will it be in person? I would guess, YES!
I’m gonna put my phone down now. She’s near….