Note: this post is the first in a series of post fragments – posts I started to write but never finished. I have over 500 posts in my “drafts” folder, and I want to share some of them with you. This post, I started in March of 2018. I’m sharing it because I think there’s something interesting that I don’t understand in my longing for quantity. I hope to think more about it in coming days, but for now, this is just a pointer.
I want not one, not two, but five, ten, twenty women sucking my cock.
What excites me about strip clubs isn’t nudity, it’s quantity: the presence of dozens of women.
As with so much in my sexual constitution, it relates to some combination of my drives for safety and vitality, or, from the other side, my desperation to avoid feeling unsafe, or dead.