Jul 292012
 

The other day, I wrote, almost as an aside, that when a woman is sucking my cock, I don’t want her to be thinking in more than an ancillary way about my pleasure, and this got me to thinking.

I am scared of my desire.

I am scared it will swallow you up whole, that it will prove truly overwhelming to you, and that, in response, you will have to, out of self-preservation, leave me.

I have two strategies to protect myself from this:

1)  Submission: if, in fact, my very desire is your desire, then we’re safe, because the mere fact of my desiring something (anything) is precisely what makes you desire it.

2)  Money: if I’m paying you, your job is to endure my desire. You still may leave me, though.

This feels like a useful insight.

  5 Responses to “The meaning of paying for sex, of true submission”

  1. Can’t fight what we don’t see.

    I hear what you’re saying about being afraid. Kind of a feeling of being “too much” for anyone to really handle…or love…for any length of time. That fear that the intensity will wear them out. That it will just be too much, too long and you know that it never stops, that it’s always that intense for you…so…

    Something to consider; There are women who crave obsessive passion. They have a need deep within to be dominated by the desperate craving of another. Even if that craving is never fulfilled, they still want it. they are a different breed. They have their own brand of “insatiable” about them. But they are out there…usually hidden beneath a controlled exterior. Mostly alone because of that same fear, that their need is too great.

    just something to think about.

  2. As long as you get me off and I desire you, I won’t leave. 😉 that’s pretty simple. I can never have too much of that. Ever.

  3. I’ve never paid, but that makes sense. Makes perfect sense.

    Stay SINful
    Mr. AP

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