Jun 192012
 

There are a couple of different forms my porn-surfing takes:

1)  Purposeful: I’m going to rub one out, and I want visual stimulation.

In this instance, typically, I watch a movie that I’ve downloaded from a favorite site.  As I’ve written elsewhere, this might be AmateurAllure, X-Art, SexArt, IFeelMyself, Met-Art, or OnlyAllsites.  Most often?  AmateurAllure.  And, more recently, I’ve discovered the joys of DigitalDesire (slightly over-theatrical videos of beautiful models, typically stripping nude and then masturbating to orgasm).  I might watch snippets of one, two, or three.  But typically, I make myself cum pretty quickly, and the porn does its job efficiently.

2)  Idle, distracted:  I’m distractedly taking in what the web has to offer, typically while doing something else, just enjoying the mild stiffening action the stimulation provides.

In this instance, typically, I page through my Google Reader feed, pressing “J” (next item) and “S” for “star” (which places the item in my Tumblr, thanks to ifttt).

3)  Idle, intent:  what I’m doing is porn-surfing, seeking something “fulfilling,” “satisfying,” good.”

This is the most interesting (as in, intellectually, from a distance, to me) form of surfing.  I used to do this for hours at a time – as if there was, out there, the perfect image, or video, or porn site, that if only I could find would once and for all put an end to my quest.  It was (and occasionally is) as if there is some “right answer,” some grail which I could find.  Of course, there isn’t.  And more interesting, not only isn’t there, but the form this surfing takes belies this goal.  In this mode, I typically skate from site to site, looking for the one that appeals most, and download movie after movie, without even watching more than ten seconds of them.  In this mode, seeking is privileged over finding, downloading (acquiring) over streaming (watching), and collecting (saving) over consuming.  I often tell my kid, “It’s more fun to get than to have, but it’s better to have than to get.”  I’m like a toddler in my relationship to porn in this mode, though: I just want to get.  I take not even a moment’s pleasure in what I’ve acquired.  This is a joyless, miserable form of existence, and, like the other forms of my addictive, compulsive behaviors, makes the realm of the hungry ghosts palpable, real.

4)  With company:  this is the best – using porn as a toy, to stimulate and arouse in advance of, or during, sex.

Nuff said.

How about you? How do you consume porn?

  24 Responses to “Porn: seeking vs. finding”

  1. Hmm, my comment disappeared. Wonder where it went.

  2. most of my porn consumption is the idle kind, surfing through tumblrs looking at pictures, sometimes i’ll be looking for a particular kind of image, but its a time suck, with mild attention and mild arousal on my part. ifi’m going to get off usually its words, blogs written by men (and the occasional dyke) talking about dominating women.
    rarely have i been in a position to share, though i do have a friend who i IM with who will occasionally send me movie clips, tell me at which point he came and want to know at which point i came. i could see how that could be fun in person, maybe its a noble goal to work towards

    • I don’t know about “noble,” but it’s definitely hot. My own experience? Porn is great before and during sex, as well as an accompaniment to mutual or parallel masturbation.

  3. I’m a consumer of erotica rather than porn per se. Most professional porn turns me off, it’s just too fake. I have a vivid imagination and get much more out of a well-written piece of wild passion than having it acted in front of me. That said, I do have favourite types of images, and appreciate them when I run across them. When I go seeking, it’s for a specific type of story, from an author I know can deliver.

    ~Kazi xxx

  4. Hmmm How do I consume porn? – constantly, insatiably, hornily 🙂

  5. What is porn? One (wo)man’s porn is another (wo)man’s art…. it is all so subjective. I am a very visual person though and find that just the right image can be enough to fill my mind with everything and more…. and sometimes I just want to sit down and watch some fucking. It all depends on mood I think.

    Mollyxxx

  6. There are only one ‘condition’ that would make me surf for porn… when I am incredibly horny already. Then I tend to surf to one or two specific websites to watch some videos, but mostly they quickly bore me, because I prefer the real thing. Other than porn, I love to look at erotic images or read an erotic story. Reading and writing about sex tend to turn me on more than watching the images.

    Rebel xox

  7. I would call myself more of a thought pushed sexual person. I can get myself wet on just the thoughts of having someone. Which is also why I write. I have never been much on porn itself, Like an above commenter seems like same stuff different day on many levels. I need more. I know I am weird. But when I get into writing and I can close my eyes and see and ‘feel’ what is happening I can get off easily, repeatedly.

    • I totally understand that. Oddly, though, I find “imperfections” in written porn/erotica, whether grammar, or poor writing, or just a slight “miss” relative to my desires, more jarring than in visual porn.

      Also, I’m lazy, and erotica requires me to do more work, somehow.

  8. Hmmmm, how do I “consume porn”…… rarely is the simple answer. I find most porn boring.

    Very occasionally I may watch some for myself, but usually it is very hard and graphic BDSM (something that I will watch by myself as my bf does not like it so hard).

    Do I get off on it? In a way yes, to see someone male or female submit totally and with all of their being does arouse me, however, I do not necessarily want to masturbate to it.

    Why? I don’t know, I do get wet but not necessarily need to release that sexual tension, I revel in it, enjoy the feeling that it gives me, the buzz of being sexually aroused but to retain it I find to be something of a drug to me….the BF ultimately benefits!!! Lol

    ~Mia~ xx

  9. We watch a lot of porn, during sex and when looking to get off solo. Lately, though, we find ourselves less interested in big-budget, glossy studio porn. It takes something really out of the ordinary to get our attention. We prefer watching homemade stuff on streaming sites, the kind of videos made by regular people who are clearly enjoying themselves. However, when we’re looking for a quick, satisfying orgasm we’re probably more likely to be enjoying a sexy blog.

  10. I have never been a huge consumer of porn. The only place I regularly watch porn is (ironically) at swingers clubs. This is not usually because of the environment but more because the porn area is quieter and equipped with comfy couches which are great for making out especially for exhibitionists like myself.
    If I am watching sex I like it LIVE.
    I like to look at images but am more attracted to arty types of images and I don’t view it from a strictly erotic motivation more from a desire to see art. The type of thing that really gets me off is talking dirty to people and hearing people’s fantasies. At the right time they are incredibly stimulating.

  11. This is what I get for looking at these so late…seems Molly stole my thunder. Like so many things, porn is a matter of perspective. I prefer my sex live as well, but sometimes porn has its place.

    Stranded

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